PICTURE PAGES: CRAZY 1933 GERMAN ELECTROCUTION HANDBOOK - PART TWO

Finally, time for more fun with electricity! We now present to you part two of...

....THE CRAZY 1933 GERMAN ELECTROCUTION HANDBOOK!

If you missed part one, be sure to check it out!

Now...tally-forth, kiddos...and onto the last set of 15 shockingly fun images!:




WARNING: God does not tolerate kite worshiping. All heathens will be smited.




WARNING: Washing clothes manually may suck, but suicide is not your only way out.




WARNING: You can not vacuum fire.




WARNING: Unless you're trying to get a telegram from the Grim Reaper, stabbing it with scissors just isn't gonna fix it, moron.




WARNING: Though tempting, please refrain from grabbing the giant phallic oven rod.




WARNING: If you've managed to put on a bra, nightie, gartered stockings and even heels since getting out of the shower, your hair probably isn't wet anymore.




WARNING: Unless your name is Flava Flav, the wearing of a giant oversized telephone necklace is a fashion crime punishable by death.



WARNING: Just because it looks like fun to pee on, doesn't mean it is. And stop using a backhanded grip while grabbing your junk. It makes you look silly.




The 1933 version of the "Slap Chop" was not as easy to clean as Vince had promised on the infomercial.




WARNING: Don't ever think you are safe. EVER. Stay dirty, stay alive!




WARNING: Even rats can't resist the sweet, sweet taste of death.




WARNING: Electrocuting yourself won't garner attention from Daddy, he's just too busy to care. When in doubt, try the trusted method of becoming a stripper.




WARNING: Exorcism in progress.




WARNING: Do not use electricity in an attempt to curdle milk faster. It doesn't work.





WARNING: Though effective, please refrain from using electricity to neuter your pet.


Enjoy your day, and remember; beware the rat smart enough to chew the ground wire....

....thus sayeth the Bitter Old Bitch.

PICTURE PAGES: CRAZY 1933 GERMAN ELECTROCUTION HANDBOOK - PART ONE

Ever wonder how many different ways you can electrocute yourself to death? Well wonder no more, for today we present....

*drum roll*

....THE CRAZY 1933 GERMAN ELECTROCUTION HANDBOOK!

That's right children, take a peek at the many ways you too can be fried to a crisp, all from the comforts of your own home.

I'm particularly amused at how the artist warns people about many scenarios that seem, well..."improbable" to put it mildly. Whoever drew these scenes was one sick puppy with a hell of an imagination. KUDOS!

Without further ado, here is part one of our two part "Crazy 1933 German Electrocution Handbook" gallery. Enjoy!


WARNING: Not for use as a pacifier.



WARNING: If you are dumb enough to put a lamp over your tub, you deserve what you get.


WARNING: Electricity gets jealous if you decide to go with candles instead of electric lights on your Christmas tree.



WARNING: Stopping dam leaks with your finger is a Dutch thing in which German electricity refuses to tolerate.


WARNING: Shamwows are awesome, but may cause electrocution.


WARNING: Simpletons spontaneously bursting out air guitar solos will not be tolerated by any means.


WARNING: Frayed electrical cords may appear dirtier than they actually are.


WARNING: Do not listen to your ipod and practice your pop and lock moves while ironing.


WARNING: Read your damn book inside the house.


WARNING: 1933 technology is not far advanced enough for the iron to do the work itself.


WARNING: Darwinism at work.


WARNING: Don't ever, ever piss off your mailman.


WARNING: Do not leave your "SüperEnema 5000" kit unattended.


WARNING: Just because you are a train conductor doesn't mean you can't be another kind of conductor too.


WARNING: Douchebags may be tempted to use electricity as the "ultimate prank".

Stay tuned for part 2!

NOTE: PART 2 is now up!

....thus sayeth the bitter old bitch.

And now for no reason whatsoever.....

....a "balloon animal" of Halo's Master Chief.

REASON #13,625 FOR WHY YOU SHOULDN'T DO METH: (WARNING - VERY VERY GROSS! YOU'VE BEEN WARNED!!!)

......because doing meth can lead to you thinking disemboweling yourself is a *good* idea. Yeah, really kiddos!

Like this guy...

--click for larger image if you can stomach it.--
(Whazaa! Pun of the day! XD)


(NOTE: This is an actual graphic documentation of a true case. After becoming high on meth this gentleman started cutting himself open. He ended up surviving his injuries, but damn...just DAMN! If you've ever thought of doing meth, I hope this image is burned in all you whippersnappers' young minds!)

Meth is bad, mmmkay?.....thus sayeth the bitter old bitch.

PRINTER-HATING KITTY CAT

You know what? I hate printers too. Last time I tried printing some online coupons for my ensure drinks the damn thing jammed on me. I should invite this cat over and have it teach my printer who is the boss.

Top Twenty Strange My Little Customised Ponies

Obviously there are a ton of people out there with a hobby I never knew existed - what is this hobby you ask? Create custom bastardized My Little Ponies. :D Seriously. I wish I could do things like that myself - I'm pretty jealous! Talk about using art in a way I can enjoy for once! If only the original ponies I had as a kid were this cool!

Hmmm....I wonder if I can get myself a dia de los muertos pony?

Anyhow, here are the top twenty crazy "My Little WTFs" I was able to scurry up for your viewing pleasure...enjoy!:

#20: MY LITTLE BOBA FETT



#19: MY LITTLE CAPTAIN JACK



#18: MY LITTLE WORF



#17: MY LITTLE ZOMBIE



#16: MY LITTLE STORMTROOPER



#15: MY LITTLE MEGATRON



#14: MY LITTLE BATMAN AND ROBIN



#13: MY LITTLE BODY WORLDS PONY



#12: MY LITTLE CHEWBACCA



#11: MY LITTLE TROJAN HORSE



#10: MY LITTLE ALIEN



#9: MY LITTLE MASTER CHIEF



#8: MY LITTLE BRIDE FROM KILL BILL



#7: MY LITTLE HE-MAN


(which wouldn't be complete without....)

#6: MY LITTLE SKELETOR



#5: MY LITTLE JOKER



#4: MY LITTLE SPIDERMAN




#3: MY LITTLE EDWARD SCISSORHANDS



#2: MY LITTLE SLAVE LEIA




#1: MY LITTLE MR. T




NOTE: Special thanks goes out to the nice folks over at My Little Pony Arena - who are some really cool people with a good sense of humor. If you want to get yourself hooked up with your own little MLP custom, check out their forums and ask around, I'm sure they'll be happy to help.